To Write or Not to Write?

It’s finals week and I’m here at our college’s library writing yet another blog entry. Initially, I wanted to write after finishing my only exam for today. But after renting out a computer, I lost the inspiration to do so. I just ended up doing a few stuff and watching a video. When I tried ending my time, the guy behind the desk told me that I’d still have to pay for an hour since I passed the 30-min mark.

SO here I am getting my money’s worth for the next 15 minutes. As much as I’d like this to be a flash post, I don’t really know where I stopped, so might as well just not make it one.

Well, I guess I just really wanted to write about how I got exempted in taking the finals for the majors (Operations Research) that I failed a year ago which caused me to get delayed. Can we just talk about how the Lord is so wonderful?? Like seriously, two weeks ago, I was praying to get exempted and, thankfully, I made the effort of studying at the library and taking Grab rides home. IT WAS ALL WORTH IT! THANK YOU, LORD! TO GOD BE ALL THE GLORY!

Now, I technically have three finals, two final papers, and a final prototype left before my semester (AND FOURTH YEAR IN COLLEGE) are finally over.

I’ve learned A LOT of things this semester, especially with regards to time management (because mine was, and still is, horrible) and finance management. LIKE SERIOUSLY, I’d say that this semester has been the worse I’ve had, hopefully, till’ the end of my undergraduate life. But more on that after finals.

9 minutes left. Also I’m listening to Jeremy Jordan’s rendition of “It’s All Coming Back to Me” again because IT’S SO GOOD.

There’s a lot of things that I’ve done this semester that I don’t plan on doing ever again.

7 minutes left. I’d also like to take this opportunity to take my family for keeping me grounded and for supporting me, even if sometimes that means making me sad.

6 minutes. Thank you also to my home away from home for always being there for me to run to. Seriously, my college life is truly better with you in it.

5 minutes. Thank you to my friends, especially to my forever constant home best friend and to my best friends in college. Without you, I’d probably be insane and be even worse of an overthinker than I already am.

4 minutes. Well, I think it’s about time for me to post this and log out.






Guess who just felt like dropping by and writing an entry AFTER SUCH A LONG TIME (approx. 2 months)?

Me. But of course you probably knew that already, huh?

Some time around April, I dropped by this blog and found out that I had already missed this blog’s SEVENTH anniversary! Thank you, WordPress, for the greeting and for reminding me that I have to write a somewhat decent post for this blog’s SEVENTH anniversary. Just because I forgot doesn’t mean the thought doesn’t count anymore. Better now than never, yeah? @/MeFromAboutAYearAgo

If you’re not new here, then you could probably tell how much I don’t post anymore. I wasn’t able to post a single entry last March AND April. I thought of writing a few times before the previous months ended, but I felt like I was forcing myself to write just because I needed at least one post for that month. I didn’t like the idea so I didn’t go through with it.

In any case, first things first, I would like to greet my little blog a HAPPY SEVENTH BIRTHDAY! Imagine, if this blog was a kid, I would have to have thrown a legit birthday party with games, cake, and guests hahaha. But it’s thankfully not because it wouldn’t have gotten to it’s seventh if it was a human being with those three months without a single post, right?

Well, this semester has become the messiest semester of my college life (hopefully till’ the end of it). I’ve most likely hit rock bottom striving to pass at least three classes so I wouldn’t get kicked out of my college. I’d like to say that my majors are doing better than the engineering science classes I’m taking this semester. I’d be incredibly happy when I pass those three majors but I’d be happier if I could add at least one engineering science class along with them.

For the past three days, I’ve been studying for the Operations Research exam I took yesterday and it was a bit easier than what I expected, BUT there is this really confusing bit and the professor isn’t too generous with partial points. I’m really praying that I get a high grade in that exam because I REALLY need to get exempted from taking the final exam. Whatever your beliefs or your religion is, I’d like to ask you to pray for me. You have no idea how much I’d appreciate it.

I could tell you all more about the past two months that I haven’t been posting, but it would most probably bore you anyway so I’m not going to do that. Right now, I’m generally okay with life. I just really REALLY need to get through the remaining weeks of this semester and pass AT LEAST three classes. Then I’m good.

I kinda promise to post a better entry after this whole thing. Hopefully by then I’m inspired to write about something.

Anyway, thanks for dropping by, reading my posts, and for supporting this little blog of mine since 2012 (such a wow).


Forever n always~

The Girl With The Pen




On My Way Back Home

After around 2 weeks of not writing in this blog, your resident lost girl is back at it again. Writing isn’t something I get to do often anymore not only because I don’t spend as much time on it but also because inspiration only comes to me ever so often. It’s something I enjoy doing, especially since I think I can express myself more easily through it. But it isn’t something I’m necessarily good at either. Honestly, I’ve had to turned down a really good opportunity to write simply because I was having problems with writing decently and thinking creatively. I’m actually still having problems with that area. I think, to be able to write better, one has to make a conscious effort to learn how to do so and to practice the craft frequently. Needless to say, as busy as I am with all kinds of things (important things, of course), I haven’t had the chance.

Also, while we’re on the topic of losing interest and skill in things I used to love, I’m kind of slowly losing reading as my hobby. It’s sad, especially because of the fact that I’m still in the denial and I still buy tons of books that end up stuck inside our mini library.

But I saw a picture from a Facebook post quite recently and it kind of gives me hope that someday, I’ll be able to find my love for reading again.

No photo description available.

(Credits to Grant Snider for the scarily accurate picture.)

But, oddly enough, those things aren’t actually what I came here to write about. I actually wanted to write to let go of the things that have been bothering me for a while and, hopefully in the process, I find the hope that I need to survive the semester.

As of writing, I have at least two classes that I’m struggling with. And by that, I mean there’s a huge probability that I might have badly failed in the first long exams of said classes. If you aren’t new here, then you could probably infer that my time management skills are as bad as ever. I can’t actually say whether they were ever as good as I needed them to be, referring to my high school days, or it was just easier to study during that time. In any case, I need to exert a lot of force (in giga newtons) to be able to lift up my grades enough to pass those classes this semester. I can’t give up because I’ve already done that once and that’s what got me into this mess of being delayed in the first place. And I’ve already let myself and a lot of people down too much.

Another reason why I can’t fail any of my classes this semester (which I’m not going to) is because I have a decision, one that I made years ago, that I have to revisit soon. There’s quite a lot of questions to be pondered upon regarding this matter and important factors to be considered. Are they not enough for me? Will it be worth it in the end? See the line where the sky meets the sea?

And, quite related to the previous matter but, for obvious reasons, not entirely, I’d like to say that I’ve moved on. While it’s true that I inevitably think of him every now and then, especially given the circumstances and the (ever so slightly tampered) probabilities we’d bump into each other, I’d like to say that I can only ever see him as a friend from now on. It’s true that he will more than likely always be as cute and as nice and as *insert his many wonderful qualities here* as ever, I think it’d be better to just let it go for now.

In the smallest chance that the person I’m referring to might be reading this, thank you so much for being the nicest crush I’ve had so far. Thank you for being my friend and for not being awkward, given the circumstances. You’re amazing and I wish you all the best.

Just a while ago, I was reading my old posts that came up when I searched for the word “Lost” and I saw this post I wrote almost three years ago. I decided to leave a comment and I guess I’ll just end this post with the same sentiments.

It’s okay to feel lost and to get lost every now and then. It lets you discover new things, learn lessons that you wouldn’t have learned otherwise, and it reminds you that you back home to God. I need to stop myself from just going with the flow because, even though I’m sure there’s at least some happiness in doing that, I would kind of be living my life without direction. I need to manage my time and other resources towards things that I would be proud of as I die in my deathbed. But, unlike William Ernest Henley, I wouldn’t want to be the master of my fate nor would I want to be the captain of my soul. That would cause too much over thinking and distress. I choose to trust it all to God, to do my best, because I know He will do the rest.

I wanted to end that paragraph with a semi-poetic line hahaha. Honestly, I’m a 2X years old lady who is currently stumbling her way through life. I fall n times, but, as cliche as it may sound, I strive to get back up n+1 times. I am a work-in-progress and God knows the plans He has for me. All I can do is wait patiently for Him to unveil His plans and to always try to do my best in everything to do in the process.




Resulta ng larawan para sa cute motivational gif

ALSO, I’d like to share an old favorite of mine that I literally just remembered about an hour ago. It’s a really good song and I hope you like it.

And, as always, I hope you respect my religion and beliefs as much as I respect yours to the highest regards. We’re all beautiful in our own way and the world would be a lot more wonderful if we choose to love one another.


It has only been 44 days since the new year started, but I feel like I’ve made half a year’s worth of bad decisions already. Needless to say, this isn’t how I would’ve wanted my 2019 to start. I’d like to say that most of the decisions I’ve made were well-meant because I was taking amazing opportunities for me to grow and to help out, but I might have grabbed more of them than I can actually fully commit to given my academic workload and other more important commitments (i.e. family matters).

So now, I’m kind of dropping a few of them, specifically those of which I’ve realized that I cannot undertake at the moment due to the lack of some things which are essential in accomplishing them. Along with this, of course, is letting people down. I’ve slightly been avoiding to confront these issues because I didn’t know what to do. It was a very difficult decision for me to drop these opportunities. I’ve already given my word that I’d be willing to do them. But I’ve also realized that it’d be better to let them go rather than to continue to disappoint the people who are expecting outputs from me.

If you’re one of those people who I let down, thank you for the opportunity. Sorry, again, that I disappointed you. I hope you’ll find people who are more available and more capable of finishing the work I was supposed to contribute to. I bid you good luck and I hope you have a great day!

As for the opportunities I decided to keep because I really think I can manage it, I’d like to thank the people who trust me enough to entrust these important work to me. I hope you’re not discouraged after reading the previous paragraphs of this post. Although it’s true that I’m stumbling a bit, I’ll give my best efforts and see these commitments through.

Honestly, I have a rough couple of days ahead – 1 quiz and 3 exams (2 of which are on the same day). Though I wasn’t able to write about it (so much for the hype), I was able to get that “100% of total units passed” last semester and I’m aiming for it again this semester. Another goal of mine this semester is to be exempted from taking the final exam for all my classes (where this is applicable). To be able to do so, I really need to get my shit together (pardon the language). As soon as possible.

Every now and then I ask myself how a person as messy as me could be taking up a course that upholds efficiency and effectiveness. I like my course enough, I think it’s a really great course, and I’m learning really useful lessons in my majors classes, but I hope I’ll be able to apply it to myself and to my daily life. I need it now *cries*.

I keep thinking that I need God in my life now more than ever, but I haven’t been able to set aside the time to quietly read and reflect on the Bible. I’d just like to share that praying and reading the Bible are very important activities which shouldn’t be overlooked. Through prayer, we are able to communicate with God and, through reading the Bible, He is able to communicate with us.

Of course, if you’re not Christian, I still COMPLETELY respect you and your beliefs. I would appreciate it very much if you could do the same for me. We are all beautiful and I really believe that we’ll be able to get through whatever challenges we’re currently faced with in life. Just keep moving forward.

Well, that’s all for now. Advance Happy Valentine’s Day! I don’t think I’ll be able to write tomorrow, but hopefully I’ll get to write when the first wave of hell weeks is over. Seize the day~!



Image result for cute motivational gifs


Twenty Nineteen

I’m aware that it has been 3 days since the actual New Year’s celebration, but I haven’t properly gathered my thoughts enough to write a decent post and I’d rather post the entry late than start the year with a crappy first post. Although I don’t have it all together, as of writing, I think I know what I’d like to write about more or less, so here it goes.

FIRST OF ALL, I would like to greet each and every one of you a very HAPPY NEW YEAR! Given that the greeting is already days late, I hope all of you have been enjoying this year, so far. Honestly, my days have been pretty normal, but I’m quite determined to make 2019 my year. 

But before that, let me look back for the last time at the year that was mine, 2018. Last year was a particularly tougher year, I’d say. I failed a majors class that because I gave up on it early on when I could’ve gave it a lot more effort. And BECAUSE of that, I am now delayed by a year (meaning: I will be graduating a year later than expected). My grandfather died five days after my birthday, then my grandfather’s sister’s husband died about a month after.

The first few months of my fourth year were really challenging times because my mom and I fought more than we usually did and I couldn’t deal with the fact that I wasn’t as accomplished and goal-driven as I was in high school. I wasn’t the person who could write kind-of good poems and short stories. I remember breaking down and crying one night with no one to talk to because I was reading a poem that I had written months before and felt that I didn’t know who I was anymore. It felt like I wasn’t myself anymore. And, towards the end of the semester, I disappointed my groupmates and ended up giving them a VERY difficult time because I wasn’t able to help them as much as I should have with our project.

Yes, it would seem like 2018 was a bad year for me, but that couldn’t be more further to the truth that I now believe. It was very challenging, yes, but I am beyond thankful to God for the experiences I was able to have, the people I was able to meet, get to know more, and become close with, and the lessons that I was able to learn. Of course, I have ways to go before becoming the smart, strong, independent woman that I’d like to be in the future, but I’d like to say that I’m a few small steps closer to that, at least.

A few of the MANY MANY things that God blessed me with last year were the following. Note that these are just a couple of my favorites and God is so good that even if I didn’t deserve any of these, He still blessed me with these amazing graces.

  • I was able to find my home and family in the university which is my new organization. I think I wrote about applying for it during the first half of the year and, though I’m not sure how prevalent it was in any of my other posts, the family I found there pretty much made my days last year. I especially enjoy eating out with them and being able to play card games and board games at our place, but just being around them on a normal day even when everyone’s busy doing their own thing, make me feel at home. Going to our place and being with you all has been the highlight of my days last year. Thank you.
  • I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again – I love my high school best friend (if you’re reading this, you’d know this is you). Even though we don’t see each other as often as we did back then, she never fails to have my back. We’re super alike in so many ways to the point where we’re actually both unlucky in the love department (who says that tho??), but the only difference is that she’s something like a guy magnet (yes, that’s a thing, and that’s her) and I’m not. Aside from family, she is my favorite person and I am blessed to have her as my best friend. JUST TO CLARIFY, we love each other so much in a platonic level. I’m very excited to have double dates with her and our special someones.
  • Last 2017, I was blessed to meet a new friend who, flash forward to 2018, would be someone who would help me grow closer to Jesus Christ and would continuously guide me in improving my relationship with Him. I don’t know if she knows that I have a blog (well, I’m probably going to tell her soon), but I am very very thankful for having her as a sort of older sister and disciple-r figure for me. To this person, thank you for accompanying me to lunches, for teaching me more about His word, for giving me the rational kind of advice that I need in an almost day-to-day basis, and simply for listening to my rants and life stories. Sorry I haven’t legit started on the book of John yet, but I will SOON.
  • I was actually supposed to cross register into another campus last summer, but due to the circumstances, I wasn’t able to do so. BUT I am very happy with how I was able to spend that summer with my wonderful Philosophy professors, my classmates, and ESPECIALLY my groupmates. Though we weren’t able to disprove our professor’s theory, I still very much would like to have them continue to be part of my life. We’re really different in terms of background, colleges, courses, personality, and the like but I’d say that’s what makes it more fun. Thank you for being the summer plot twist of 2018. I miss you all very dearly and I hope we can all get together soon.
  • And, though I wasn’t able to write about it here, I was actually EXEMPTED from taking my Engineering Statics final exam. I’m not actually sure how often I wrote about it, but it’s a class I took THREE TIMES. The first time, I had the wrong “footing” and it was either I dropped the class or failed it. So I decided to drop it (which is a pretty good decision, considering I failed two classes that semester). The second time, I had this amazing professor, but I still wasn’t able to properly grasp the lessons, so I failed. Though I did pass two out of those four exams and I only needed 7 more correct answers to have passed that time, BUT I’m pretty okay with my taking the third time because I really need to master the lessons and if I had passed that, I think  I would’ve had a hard time with the next classes that I have to take. And lastly, the third time: I had a great professor who was very approachable. I took it with my college best friend and a friend that I met during my days as a Philosophy major (aka during the “semester of enlightenment”, his words not mine). AND I GOT EXEMPTED!

Again, I really don’t deserve any of the things above and any of the things I was blessed with last year, but God is merciful and generous in giving His graces. To God be the glory forever and ever.

NOW we can finally get to the part where I talk about how I see myself in this coming year. If you’d like to have a CR break, then goahead. It’s fine. Let’s play one of my favorite videos from last year while we wait here for you.

Last year’s word of the year was “Challenge” and, though I wasn’t always able to give my best in dealing with the challenges I was faced with, I was definitely able to get to know myself better, how poorly I dealt with some of the challenges, and the points for improvement I need to become a better version of myself.

This 2019, my word of the year is Unleash. In one of the year-end messages that I received from acquaintances, they mentioned that I “definitely have a lot of potential” and, since then, I’ve decided that this year will be the year that I exceed myself and unleash that potential within me. Potential isn’t really something that’s of value to me unless I act upon it. And that’s what I plan to do this year. Of course, responsibility, accountability, and time management, above other things, come along with that.

Honestly, I’m going to need the support of my family and friends as much, if not more, as I needed it during the previous years of my life. I am 100% sure that the upcoming semester is going to be one heck of a ride, especially since I’m retaking the ESSENTIAL majors class I failed last year, two other VERY IMPORTANT majors classes, Mechanics of Deformable Bodies, and at least one more Engineering disciple class. Aside from Academics, of course there’s the much awaited College Week (ONE!) and other “possibilities”.

With regards to the BIG decision I have to make, I’ve thought about it long and hard every day for the past two weeks or so and I’m choosing to STAY. It’s really hard to close such an alluring possibility of a future with them, but I’m going to have to stick to the decisions I made back in 2015, no matter how much I feel like I don’t belong and no matter how replaceable I feel. Why? That night, while everybody was “going back home” and celebrating, I was contemplating on why I was even there and how it didn’t matter if I were to go. I remember thinking whether I should move to the other, but I didn’t have as strong and valid reasons back then as I do now. I guess the most important factor is that I already have the family (in the university, of course) I was so badly craving for that night. I already have a home that I get to go back to when I feel lost, sad, confused, sleepy, and happy. With that home in my heart now, I don’t think I can risk joining another if it means not getting to spend as much time with my home as I did last year.

To make the long story short, I’m choosing to stay despite of having regrets because I’ve already found my home . With the love and support they give me, along with those of my family and friends, I can continue to stay in the place where, even though I feel like an outsider, I am constantly being challenged to step up my game and give my best in my projects because of all the extremely passionate people I am surrounded by. My heart will always be with the ones I found my home with, but I think I also need this decision for myself. I really hope that I’ll feel a little bit more belong with them.. with effort. This is goodbye to that other possibility. You will always (probably) be my biggest “what if” of my college life

And this is the end of my rather lengthy “Happy New Year’s” post! I’m really excited for everything that God has in store for me this 2019, whether it’s a good or bad because I hope to grow from it either way. With that, let me leave you with a few quotes from Dr. Seuss and some of my favorite Bible verses. Again, HAPPY NEW YEAR! And let’s slay 2019 together with love! ❤

Resulta ng larawan para sa dr seuss oh the places you'll go quotes

Resulta ng larawan para sa dr seuss oh the places you'll go quotes

Resulta ng larawan para sa jeremiah 29 11]

Resulta ng larawan para sa for with god, nothing is impossible

Resulta ng larawan para sa hebrews 13 5


(I do not own the video and the images above. Credits to their rightful owners.)


Kaugnay na larawan




P.S. I’m turning 21 this year. WHAAAAAT??

P.P.S. Also, this will probably be my last low-key post. I’ve moved on yay!

Post-Christmas & Pre-New Year’s

My semester’s already over and as much as I would LOVE to post that blog entry with the title “100%”, I kind of promised myself that I’d post it when I finally get that “100% of total units passed”. Unfortunately, two of my professors still haven’t posted my grades in their classes. One of them’s pretty notorious for posting it late and the other has a COMPLETELY understandable reason for not being able to post it on time. I guess I’ll just have to wait a little longer, but with God’s graces and mercy, I know I can get that 100%.

I wasn’t able to post a “Merry Christmas!” entry here because we were pretty busy days before and the day after Christmas. But, in any case, I’d like to greet each and every one of you a merry merry Christmas! I guess this has been the most enjoyable Christmas in a while. I hope you all enjoyed it as well! Of course, let us never forget the reason for this season – Jesus Christ!

Resulta ng larawan para sa john 3:16

ALSO let me link a post by Thought Catalog. You might not need it right now, but I suggest you save it somewhere somehow (downloaded it on my phone) for the future. It’s also very handy to have a Bible app on your phone because you get to read God’s word anytime anywhere.

27 Bible Verses To Uplift You And Bring You Hope, Even In Darkness

In other news, I am SUPER ready to leave 2018 and welcome 2019 already! But before then, I plan on making something to cherish the memories that God brought and the people who he blessed me with this year. I have a few ideas for my new year’s resolution, but I haven’t gotten into writing it just yet.

And SPEAKING of the year and, more particularly, the semester ahead, I think I’m gonna need a lot of mental and emotional strength to be able to make it through unscathed. I have this kind of life-changing decision that I need to make now or never. I’m still praying for God to guide me through it. And aside from that, there’s college week, my retaking of a class I failed almost a year ago, and more. Shoutout to my super duper supportive best friend for life for always being just a message away! I love you, bby!

I guess that’s it for this post. Holiday season can be rough for some people, so I hope you’re all doing okay. Let me leave you with one of my favorite quotes from one of my all-time favorite movies. I do not own any of the pictures in this post. Credits to the owner of the picture above and to Gian Nicdao (from his public album, Illustrator Pile) for the picture below. Please please do not copy/use without crediting the rightful owners.


(ALSO! I will most likely probably start sharing this blog’s new content with my Twitter account mid-January. If I do go for the giant leap, maybe mid-June. Sorry, again, to my personal friends who think my blog is dead and gone. It wasn’t, isn’t, and never will be. I just need to keep it from you a little while longer.)



I finished my LAST final exam for this semester around 4 hours ago!! I’m giving myself a completely undeserved break right now because I only have a paper and a poster left. I don’t deserve a break because I’ve procrastinated until the last minute (quite literally) to study for my previous two final exams. I’ve given myself to many breaks! But I’m taking another one now anyway. HAHAHA.

After attempting to cram a semester’s worth of knowledge into a night for both of my last final exams, my advice for myself and for anyone who’s still in college, PLEASE, FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THINGS GOOD AND BEAUTIFUL, SAVE YOURSELF FROM THE HORRORS OF FINAL EXAMS! If it’s possible to be exempted from taking the finals, aim for that! Because it will ALWAYS be worth it! And if it isn’t possible, PLEASE STUDY WEEKS BEFORE THE ACTUAL EXAM. Temporary pleasure will NEVER be worth the information overload and possible breakdowns in the near future.

Aside from that, it has been especially challenging these past few weeks because of how incompetent I am as a person. It’s not always easy to admit that and I’ve caused a lot of people inconvenience by being such a nuisance, but admitting and accepting that I have a problem is the first step towards progress. Although I fluctuate every now and then, I’m trying to improve and, by God’s graces, mercy, and guidance, I can become a better version of myself.

On a more positive note, whenever I type my new site URL, I feel kinda happy because it’s still low-key and I can still write about most things I feel like writing about. Technically, I haven’t explicitly written about it, but I’d say I’m almost done with “the process”! It’s been a long time since I’ve written about that particular person and I AM NOT going to start again now (this doesn’t count!). Actually it’s just me, my ~feelings~, and

Moving on!

Can I just say how wonderful “Kung Di Rin Lang Ikaw” by December Avenue and Moira Dela Torre and “Sa Ngalan ng Pag-ibig” by December Avenue is?? It’s kind of heartbreaking but at the same time it’s so nice?? It’s also not just for people with crushes. Exhibit A – me!

It’s probably one of the songs that I enjoy listening to as a hopeless romantic HAHAHA. Hopefully, they’d inspire me enough so that I’d be able to write a short story soon. My Wattpad account is DYING.

LASTLY, I’ve been hooked again by HIMYM! It’s been YEARS since I last watched the last season, but I saw this video in Youtube and I DIED. Well, not literally, but you get the point.


I watched it during a study break and I teared up at a particular part. You’ll find out if and when you watch it!